


On the Edge of Your Universe

by dreyars



Series: Haikyuu!! Rarepairs Week [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mostly Fluff, Multi, it doesnt end sad i swear, they're all together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-28
Updated: 2015-03-28
Packaged: 2018-03-20 02:00:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3632415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreyars/pseuds/dreyars
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He loved them. He truly, truly did.  He wanted them to love him too, but he was starting to think that maybe four was too much of a crowd for one relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	On the Edge of Your Universe

**Author's Note:**

> HQ Rarepairs Week Day 4 : Unrequited

“Hanamaki, why don’t you join us on the couch?” Iwaizumi called to him as he passed through the kitchen, balancing drinks and a bowl of chips on his arms.  He lifted an eyebrow at the boy who barely picked his head up from his textbook to answer.

“Nah. Don’t worry about me.” He tapped a finger on the papers he was working on before Iwaizumi was satisfied.  “Gotta do this.”

“Awe, Maki-chan, you’re so lame.” Oikawa whined from the living room, turning around to hang backwards off the couch.  Matsukawa groaned when Oikawa elbowed him in the face, but didn’t bother to remind him that he had been sitting in his lap before he decided to turn into a contortionist.  “It’s Friday, and Friday is date night.  Friday means you spend time with meeeee.”

Matsukawa grabbed Oikawa by the hips, forcing him to turn around and sit still.  “Let’s just leave him be.  If he’s insisting on doing homework rather than spending time with us, then he must have something that’s past due.”

Oikawa whined again and Iwaizumi swatted him in the back of the head before he finally settled down enough to stretch himself across the two dark haired boys’ laps.  They continued in a new conversation, completely forgetting Hanamaki’s absence, until they realized they had forgotten to put whatever DVD Oikawa had decided on into the machine.  After a few more minutes of scrambling, a thump and a yelp from Oikawa getting pushed to the floor, Hanamaki finally heard the movie start playing in the living room.

It wasn’t a very good environment to be doing homework in.  Not with the periodic shouts from one of the three in the living room and the explosions and loud music from the movie.

Not that it really mattered.  He hadn’t intended to get much of this project done.  It was just an excuse so he didn’t have to be sitting in there with his boyfriends.

Or whatever they were at this point.

Their little dynamic had started in high school.  A sloppy game of spin the bottle during a training camp in their first year had opened them up to the weird possibilities of ‘hey, maybe this could work with a guy?’ when really, none of them had ever thought of it before.  That morphed over their three years in high school into Iwaizumi and Oikawa _finally_ going out at the end of their third year.  And that adapted into Matsukawa joining their little party shortly after starting college when they both realized that they had a thing for the sleepy eyed giant for longer than they had had a thing for each other.

And a few weeks after that, Hanamaki got tacked on to the end after he had walked into the dorm room he shared with Matsukawa and seen the three of them in more than a state of undress.

At that point Hanamaki was concerned he was going to either die from a heart attack or from all the blood moving much too quickly out of his head.  He had known for much longer than their first year of high school that he was into dudes.  Hell, in elementary, he had been the one going around claiming other boys in his class to be his husband.  So when he walked in and saw three of the guys he had been admiring from afar like _that_ … 

He was in shock only long enough for his mouth to fall open before he heard Oikawa laugh and Iwaizumi suggested that he join them.

After that, he was in pure heaven. 

And it went beyond the fact that he had gotten to see and participate in the craziest four-way he could have ever imagined.  No, he now got to be a part of the weirdest, most amazing, caring, and loving relationship he could never have imagined.

At the end of their first year, they moved in together.  It was a two bedroom situation because there was no way the four full grown men could fit in a cracker box sized apartment for any length of time and only share one room.  But it worked out.  They were together when they needed to be, and they each had just enough space to themselves to be comfortable, but still intimate.

That was until Hanamaki started doubting himself.

He began noticing subtle things.  Like the fact that the one day that he had legitimately needed to study and couldn’t participate on date night, the only arguments that came from the living room were playful little rows over who was cheating at Mario Kart.  No big explosive things that usually arrived when he allowed himself to be thrown into the mix.

Or, the fact that he had come home on more than one night and found the three of them tangled up in bed, fast asleep.  Sure, he had a lot of night classes while the other guys had mornings, but still, it didn’t feel nice to go to bed alone when your three boyfriends were lost in each other in another room.

And then there was still the issue of they would just stop asking him to do things.  It used to be that no one would let it go after he said no the first time, and someone (usually Oikawa) would pester him until someone else (usually Matsukawa) finally convinced him to come.  But now, they would ask once, and that would be it.  Maybe he didn’t really want to go to all of the ridiculous outings they went on, but now it kind of just seemed like they didn’t even care that much whether or not he tagged along.

And it sucked.  It sucked all kinds of ass and balls and whatever other profanities he was too exhausted to come up with at this time.

He really did like all of them too.  Sure their personalities clashed sometimes, but it didn’t mean that he didn’t care about each and every one of them.

Like Oikawa.  Even Hanamaki couldn’t deny that he was drop-dead gorgeous despite his awful personality. But even then, Oikawa could usually figure out just what to say to make him feel better when he felt like shit.  And it didn’t help anyway that he always had the softest hands that could massage out any knot in his neck within a matter of minutes.

And Iwaizumi. They clashed the most because their personalities were the most alike.  He didn’t have a very good way with words, but he had the perfect aura for just sitting down and talking to him.  He may not even say much more than ‘that sucks’ after a long winded rant, but just talking to him made Hanamaki feel stronger on the best occasions.  That’s everything Iwaizumi is.  Strong, steady, and comforting. 

And of course Matsukawa.  He had been the one Hanamaki always clicked with the best in high school, but that’s probably because he got on so well with everybody.  He had a gentle voice and gentle hands and a warm, welcoming atmosphere about him that just made Hanamaki want to cuddle up beside him and never ever let go. 

Hanamaki loved all of them.  Separately, together, it didn’t matter. He loved them. But sometimes… more often than not, it felt like he didn’t fit in with their party of four.

Like maybe, they would be better off with just a trio.

Hanamaki let out a loud sigh, slamming his book shut and standing up.  He didn’t know how long he had been sitting at the kitchen table, but he figured there would at least be 20 minutes left or so of the movie that he could indulge the others with his lack luster presence.

However, when he moved from the kitchen to the living room, the TV was already dark and the trash from the snacks and drinks neatly shoved into the empty chip bowl.  He could still hear them moving about in the other rooms, so he let his shoulders relax a bit knowing that they hadn’t left him behind.

Matsukawa emerged from the bedrooms first, shoving an arm into a warm coat.  He smiled at Hanamaki standing in the middle of the hallway before walking over to give him a kiss between the eyebrows.

“Don’t worry, you didn’t miss anything.”

“Huh, did you say something, Mattsun?”  Oikawa’s voice pierced the relative calm that Hanamaki was feeling.  Matsukawa didn’t respond, simply letting out a loud sigh as he rolled his eyes.

“We’re going to get something to eat now.  Date’s not over yet. You can still join us.”

“Yeah, I know. Just…” Hanamaki rubbed the back of his neck, letting out a little half-laugh as Matsukawa watched him.  “Long week.  I think I just want to go to bed.”

Matsukawa hummed to himself as he inspected his boyfriend’s face.  Hanamaki could tell Matsukawa knew he was lying, and he felt his face warm as the stare continued.  After a little bit, Matsukawa just shrugged, turning towards the front door to grab his boots when he heard Oikawa and Iwaizumi leave the bedroom.  “Well, the offer is still open if you change your mind soon.”

“Nah, I’m okay. Go on without me.”

“Awe, is Maki-chan sick too?” Oikawa threw an arm around his shoulder and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.  He pulled away too soon, and Hanamaki only got a whiff of his deep cologne before he hopped over to the door to grab Matsukawa’s hand.

“Do you want us to bring you something, Hana?” Iwaizumi didn’t kiss him, but he didn’t really expect it.  He just clapped him on the shoulder, warm fingers burning Hanamaki’s skin through his thin tshirt.

Hanamaki just shook his head in response to both questions, crossing his arms over his chest as he stood watching the three finish putting on their outerwear. “Nah it’s okay, I’ll be fine. I’m going to shower and go to bed so don’t bother.”

“If you change your mind, you know our numbers.”

Hanamaki waved off Iwaizumi’s reminder with a bored look on his face. “Got it. You know where I’ll be so… have fun.”

Iwaizumi shrugged, stomping out the front door, closely followed by Oikawa who was excitedly pestering him with a line of questions that ultimately seemed to climax at whether or not it was appropriate to have only profiteroles for breakfast the next morning. Matsukawa hung back, one hand on the door knob as he turned around to look at Hanamaki.

“Are you okay?”

“What, yeah? I’m fine. You better go or they’ll run off without you.”

“If something’s bothering you, you know you can tell us.” Matsukawa shrugged his shoulders, pulling his coat tighter around himself as a blast of cold wind hit him from the doorway.  “Or at least me.  You’ve never had a problem telling me things before.”

“Dude, I’m fine. If I had a problem, I’d tell you.  Don’t worry. Have fun.”  Hanamaki waved his hand, turning around to head down the hallway towards the bathroom.  He thinks he hears Matsukawa sigh before the heavy front door slams shut and keys jingle in the lock.

Hanamaki groaned when he was finally sure the other three were gone.  He stretched his arms over his head before making his way to the bathroom to shower.

It was going to be a long night.

\-------

“Maki-chan has been very sad lately, hasn’t he?” After dinner, Oikawa pulled Iwaizumi and Matsukawa down the sidewalk, each of his arms hooked through the crooks of his boyfriend’s elbows. Iwaizumi had finished complaining about how rude they were being, taking up the entire sidewalk even in a big city like this, but Oikawa wouldn’t have anyone being left with cold hands.

“He has seemed really down recently.  Especially since he keeps doing homework instead of doing things with us.”  Iwaizumi mumbles an apology to the elderly couple Oikawa nearly forced him to run into before shifting the large bag of cream puffs they had picked up for their dejected lover into his other hand so that it wouldn’t get squished.

“Maybe he’s failing a class,” Oikawa pondered as he stuck out his bottom lip.  “Or maybe he doesn’t like us anymore.”

“Nah, I don’t think it’s any of that.”

“Oh, Mattsun finally speaks up~!”

“Why, has he said something to you, Matsukawa?”

Matsukawa shrugs, clipping Oikawa’s ear with his shoulder in the process.  “Not really.  He just seems lonely.  Almost distant.”

“We can’t let Maki be lonely!” Oikawa squeezed their arms, picking up their pace as they neared their apartment building. “Why would he be lonely? He’s around us all the time!”

“Oikawa, slow down, he’s probably already asleep.” Iwaizumi yanked on Oikawa’s arm, causing both he and Matsukawa to stumble.  “And let Matsukawa go, he has the keys.”

“I just don’t understand why he would be lonely.  Mattsun, why is he lonely?”

“I don’t know.  He’s just acting that way.  And seriously let me go or we’re all going to fall down the stairs.”

Oikawa pouted, pulling his arms away from both boys before crossing them over his chest.  They made their way up the remaining flights of stairs in silence, whispering to each other to be quiet in case Hanamaki is already sleeping as Matsukawa unlocks the door.

The apartment is dark as the door slides open.  Matsukawa walks in first, tripping over an unzipped backpack before he is able to reach the light switch.  Iwaizumi catches him by the back of his shirt before he falls, and together they shuffle through whatever mess they just created to turn on the lights.

Oikawa is still in the doorway when they turn around, sifting through the contents of the bag they just tipped over.  He looks troubled as he holds up a long sleeved green shirt that they all know to be Hanamaki’s favorite.

“I’m going to kill him,” Iwaizumi growls as he turns on his heel, only stopping when Matsukawa sticks an arm in front of his chest.

“Mattsun, is Maki trying to leave us?”

“Hush. We don’t know that for sure yet, so you two need to just calm down. Stay here and clean this up.”  Matsukawa slides his coat off of his shoulders and throws it at Iwaizumi’s face. “I’m going to go talk to him.”

“But Mattsun-”

“I said hush.” Oikawa immediately shut his mouth at Matsukawa’s fierce tone.  His eyes started to well up a bit as he sat on the floor, surrounded by Hanamaki’s clothes.  Matsukawa walked back a couple of steps so that he could ruffle Oikawa’s brown hair and squeeze Iwaizumi’s shoulder. “It’ll be okay.  Just let me talk to him first, okay?”

The pair nods, turning their attention momentarily to the mess in the entryway.  Matsukawa quietly opens the door to the bedroom he normally shares with Hanamaki, slipping in swiftly when he sees the other boy’s prone form lying face down in bed.

Matsukawa flops on the bed beside him, throwing one arm over his shoulders as he makes himself comfortable on the bed.  Hanamaki doesn’t move or make a noise as he does so, so Matsukawa pinches the skin on his neck to make him flinch.

“I know you’re awake.”

Hanamaki barely stirred, quickly turning his face so that it was facing away from Matsukawa. “Shhhh….sleeping.”

Matsukawa scooted closer, pressing his lips to the back of Hanamaki’s head as he whispered “You’d be snoring if you were sleeping.”

“Asshole.”

“Asshole? Me? Really.” Matsukawa sat up before throwing a leg across Hanamaki’s body so that he could sit on his ass.

“Ow, get off fatass!” Hanamaki squirmed, pressing up against the bed in an effort to buck Matsukawa off.

“Not until you tell me why you’ve been acting like such a pissbaby and why your shit is in a bag by the door.”

“Get off!”

“Hanamaki, tell me.”

“Seriously, Issei! You’re too heavy!”

“Takahiro.” Hanamaki stilled in his squirming at the sound of his name. He looked over his shoulder at Matsukawa still sitting on his butt with his arms crossed over his chest. “Are you leaving?”

Hanamaki turned his head back into the pillows, muffling whatever it was he had just said.  Matsukawa lifted his hips just enough to flip Hanamaki over so that he could no longer hide.

“Say it again.”

“I _said_ I was thinking about it.”

“A packed bag is more than thinking about it, Hiro.”

“Yeah well…” Hanamaki shrugged as best he could while lying on the bed. “Sometimes thinking turns into doing for me.”

“Why were you even thinking about it though?”  Matsukawa sighed, his shoulders sagging as he looked down at Hanamaki with sadness in his eyes.  “Do you not love us anymore or something?”

“Hell no, that’s not it!”

“Then what is it?”

Hanamaki flushed, head turning to the side as he tried to avoid Matsukawa’s gaze.  He felt some of the pressure ease from his hips as Matsukawa shifted on top of him, leaning forward to grab his face between his hands.

“Takahiro.” Matsukawa swallowed thickly, eyes watery as he tried to come up with words to say.  “If you truly want to leave, I know there’s nothing I can do to stop you.  I can understand if it’s something like falling out of love or if this isn’t working for you or something… but just know if it’s a selfish reason like… you think Hajime, Tooru, and I would be better off without you… then I don’t think I could forgive you for leaving.”

“Me either!”

“Shut up, Asskawa!”

Matsukawa jumped at the outburst on the other side of the door, quickly followed by a loud smack and Oikawa shouting. Hanamaki probably had enough time to slip out from underneath Matsukawa’s hips, but he simply laid there, stunned from the weird love proclamation he had just received.

Matsukawa turned his attention back to the boy on the bed as Iwaizumi opened the bedroom door, dragging a teary eyed Oikawa behind him. Matsukawa quickly dipped down, kissing Hanamaki firmly on the lips as the other two slid onto the bed on either side of them.

When Matsukawa released him, Hanamaki hardly had time to stutter out “how did you know?” before Oikawa grabbed him by the cheeks and turned his face towards him for a salty, tear stained kiss.

“Do you really think you can tell Watari about us and expect it not to get back to me somehow?” Matsukawa ran his hands up Hanamaki’s stomach, massaging up his chest as Iwaizumi attacked his neck from the other side.

Hanamaki gasped for air as Oikawa finally released him.  His eyes widened at the soft slap he received on his cheek from the brown haired boy.  “Don’t be stupid, Maki-chan. We love you.”

“Yeah, idiot.” Iwaizumi dug his fingers into Hanamaki’s hair, turning his head roughly to the side so that he could claim his lips for a few seconds.  “We love you.”

Seconds after Iwaizumi let him go, he felt Matsukawa’s soft hands back on his neck, pulling him up into a sitting position as the taller boy kissed him once more.  Oikawa’s and Iwaizumi’s hands were rubbing along his arms and his back as he kissed Matsukawa. He never knew Matsukawa to be one to cry, so he was surprised when he started feeling warm drops hitting his cheeks.  When he pulled back, he realized he had been the one crying because he was immediately barraged with a wave a kisses from his three boyfriends to wipe away the tears. Through it all, he could still hear Matsukawa speaking to him.

He could feel Oikawa’s lips on his jaw, kissing him reverently in a spot that he well knew was ticklish for Hanamaki.

“We.”

Iwaizumi was brushing his lips along his cheek, not really kissing Hanamaki because he didn’t really know another way to be gentle.

“Love.”

Matsukawa was punctuating every word with a kiss on his forehead.

“You.”

Hanamaki knew the words were meant to comfort him, but he couldn’t help it when a loud sob broke through his lips as the other three held him tight.  He knew he sounded like a child, bawling his eyes out as he pressed his face into Matsukawa’s chest and cried that he loved them too.

He knew that this wouldn’t really fix anything.  He knew that being showered with love and attention from the three best guys in the world was only a temporary solution for the aching in his heart.

But he could also tell that things had the potential to get better for him.

He cried because he realized how stupid he was forever thinking that the three around him didn’t care for him as much as they said.

He felt like an idiot for thinking that he was merely an afterthought in their relationship simply because he was the one to join it last.

And he kind of was willing to let Iwaizumi punch him in the face for almost giving up on what was arguably the best thing he had ever been fortunate enough to have.

But the three best things he would ever have were still there beside him, despite his stupidity.  Holding him, and kissing him, and loving him.

They didn’t see that he had nearly fucked up.

They only saw that he was hurting, and wanted to fix it all as quickly as possible.

And they would.

What they couldn’t fix tonight with soft touches and gentle kisses and loving words would be fixed tomorrow, or the day after, or whenever.  It would all be fixed and they would go back to being the closest thing to a cohesive whole as they would ever be.

But for now, Hanamaki would let himself be content with the heads on his shoulders and the boys in his arms and the love that had long since consumed them all.

**Author's Note:**

> if you arent shipping all the seijou 3rd years together what are you doing. But I took the unrequited thing so loosely like what even is this.
> 
> Please consider my rarepairs I'm dying over here.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Seeing Stars](https://archiveofourown.org/works/3939952) by [dreyars](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreyars/pseuds/dreyars)




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